


you, and only you.

by SHlR0GANE



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, M/M, Soulmate AU, but not for suga hehe, suga should be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:42:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24007555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SHlR0GANE/pseuds/SHlR0GANE
Summary: Everyone knows Oikawa Tooru could see colors, and that Iwaizumi Hajime had prompted it.Or so they thought.--soulmate au wherein everything is black and white until you lock gazes with your fated pair.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 8
Kudos: 87





	you, and only you.

Oikawa could never recall any point of his life where he had monochromatic vision. As far as his memories go, things were already painted with colors, even his earliest memories. It was a subject that he would constantly avoid, however; his family and closest friends know well that it's best not to mention the 'S-word' in front of the boy, since he has faced quite the amount of pressure regarding that ever since he was a child.

Many children then, and even adults, did not believe Oikawa could already see colors, and it was more unbelievable that he doesn't know who his fated one was. People were naturally curious beings, thus anything the boy had answered with _I don't know_ was subject to further questions and/or disbelief. It had made Oikawa feel like the odd-man-out for knowing what colors were, but missing the very reason why he could see them.

Iwaizumi had been the first person to defend him. They were neighbors, but had not been exactly close throughout their pre-school years due to the unfriendly nature of the dark-haired boy, but they'd known each other even before they could open their eyes properly. As Oikawa had been a person targeted by the children's and adults' pestering, he realized there were more things to avoid other than an unfriendly kid, and that Iwaizumi wasn't as bad as he thought he would be.

_"I'm his soulmate,"_ his neighbor had said coolly, _"he was too shy to admit it."_

It was an effective excuse. Throughout elementary, middle school, and high school, rumors of the two boys being soulmates never died down. The disturbances, questions, and confessions all subsided throughout the years.

(Although, they grew up to be fine young men, the number of fans, both male and female, actually _increased_ , rather than decreased, even after finding out they were soulmates.)

Since then, despite their initial distance, they've grown to become attached to the hip. Moreover, Oikawa had come to realize that, although he was sure Iwaizumi had only done that for the sake of saving him, it would sure as hell be nice if he were actually his soulmate.

______

"Iwa-chan, do you see colors?" Oikawa asked thoughtlessly while they were in his own bedroom doing their respective essays for Modern Japanese.

To say Iwaizumi was shocked, well, Oikawa wasn't really sure. He whipped his head upwards fast, with eyes wide, but slightly frowning. The taller boy couldn't really read the expression, it was really too unfamiliar for him.

"What's with this sudden question?"

He suddenly looked sheepishly at the other, realizing the magnitude of his question, especially with regards to his own feelings. He wasn't quite sure what answer he was expecting to come out of Iwaizumi, but, for some reason, he felt _hopeful_.

"Well," he said suddenly looking at things other than Iwaizumi's eyes, "I've been so used to having you calling yourself my soulmate, but you might have met yours along the way, so, you know..." he trails of, knowing that Iwaizumi was catching on. "I don't want to cause comp--"

"Oikawa, you don't like talking about that," Iwaizumi pointed out, with a hint of an emotion that he was, again, unfamiliar with--he was probably not used to hearing it from his best friend. Concern, possibly?

"It's a sensible question and reason! You can't blame me for being concerned."

He tried to make it sound as light as possible, as if he were jesting, but the way his throat tightened ever-so slightly was enough to make his voice crack.

There was a deafening silence, but Oikawa was sure Iwaizumi could hear his heart beating from across the table. He wants to laugh it out and declare that it was just a joke, but every breath he took felt like he was exhaling all the words he planned to say. And as much as he wants to retract his question, hearing this may be for the best, if he wants to sort out his feelings.

"Shittykawa," Iwaizumi says under his breath, breaking the heavy atmosphere. He turns back to writing his essay as he says "regardless, whether I could see them or not, I don't plan on leaving you alone, and that is ultimately my choice."

It wasn't the answer that Oikawa had been wanting, because after all, it was not a fitting response to the question. Instead, Iwaizumi's answer made him feel so _terrified_ despite trying to mentally convince himself that it's a response, nonetheless. But the absence of the 'yes' or 'no' only left him hanging and, the worst of all, hoping more than he did earlier.

"Okay" was the only thing he could think of.

Oikawa looks down at his hands on his lap, fingers playing with each other, as if they were itchy from restraining themselves to reach out across the table.

He stands, and walks to the door of his room.

"I...I'll just go to the toilet."

Without waiting for Iwaizumi to acknowledge what he said, he steps out. By the time he shut the door behind him, he started sobbing out of the uncertainty pricking on his chest.

______

Iwaizumi could, in fact, see colors. He remembers how much it had hurt when he had met his fated pair that he had pushed them from the shock. It felt like the hot pain in your eyes when you're trying to hold back your tears, except it was more like acid that was coming out. When he and his partner regained their composure, Iwaizumi thought that although the colors were beautiful, the pain he felt while the chemicals were settling in his eyes wasn't really worth it.

Because his partner was none other than

Sugawara Koushi.

He felt pathetic for breaking down in front of his opponent in their gym's toilet before their practice game, softly crying out Oikawa's name in emptiness. He already knew that he wasn't his best friend's fated partner, but meeting his own felt like everything was just rubbing salt into the wound he's been trying to ignore.

Sugawara had caught on, locked the door of the bathroom, and sat just across Iwaizumi as if saying that he'll be there if he wanted to say anything, whether it be good or bad. At the very least, his soulmate turned out to be a wonderful person, that much Iwaizumi knows from their first encounter.

(It just wasn't Oikawa.)

Though Iwaizumi may be against the fact that someone other than their captain was his soulmate, he was all right with trying to get close with Sugawara. They had exchanged numbers in secret after the match and they would meet occasionally when possible. Almost every part of him had hoped and thought that it could probably work out with the silver-haired boy since they were easily compatible: they were both careful people, and what ever that Iwaizumi wasn't, Sugawara made up for it, and vice versa. In spite of it all, there was a small, but not insignificant, part of him that just says

It just wasn't Oikawa.

He tries so, so damn hard trying to convince himself that he had just been attached his friend given the amount of time they had spent with each other, believing that it was them against the world, fated pair or not. He doesn't even know what it was about Oikawa that makes him want to _want_ him, but dear God, does he want him. Consequently, he ended up feeling miserable not only because of Oikawa, but also because of his own shortcomings as Sugawara's partner. Guilt was constantly eating him up at the same rate as his sadness.

He once had called his soulmate crying, Iwaizumi couldn't even think back then of being embarrassed for always coming unto him vulnerable, confessing everything and apologizing for his incompetence as a fated pair.

"I'm not saying that I'm forgiving you," Sugawara had said over the phone with a voice that was too steady for someone whose partner had just said they couldn't come to love them. "But I know it all too well, Hajime," he calls out his name as if it were the most precious word to slip out of his mouth, "because you looked petrified when we first met, even after the pain in our eyes were gone.

"When you looked at Oikawa, though, it looked like you were so thankful you could finally see him in all his beauty. It felt like I exist for the sole purpose of letting you see colors...just for you to fall further in love with him. But still, I-" his voice finally trembled, "I wanted-- _and waited_ \--for you to look at me like that."

Iwaizumi fell apart.

______

Sugawara calls out to Oikawa after Seijou's loss against their team. He doesn't really want to talk with anyone from Karasuno, but he knows the vice captain will do no further harm to his ego, and so he follows.

"I'm sorry for suddenly calling you out, especially given the circumstances," Sugawara says, wiping Oikawa's tears with his thumb, only to make the latter tremble in the tenderness of the other, "but I don't think there will be any other chance for me to say this."

He was still crying, but now he was more confused than he was depressed over their loss. His eyes finally meet Sugawara's, waiting for him to continue.

"Promise me you'll listen to me until the end?" Oikawa nods in response.

Sugawara takes a deep breath, with both hands on either of Oikawa's cheeks. "I'm Hajime's soulmate."

_Hajime...soulmate_.

A soft whine was threatening to come out of his mouth, but the setter of Karasuno grasps his head more firmly as if to stop his sobs.

"But he's head-over-heels for you."

_What is he saying? I don't understand? Why? Even if they're the fated pair? What makes you say that?_

"I know it sounds dumb at first, but I know how he feels...about us being pairs...about you, and no one knows this better other than me, because of the very reason I was made to understand him as much as I understand myself.

"But I can't be the one he loves. It has to be you." Sugawara loosens his grip and caresses the taller boy's face before letting it go. "I know for a fact that it also has to be him."

Oikawa couldn't stop crying. Now, it’s not because they had lost, but because he really wants to believe what the other had just said. Relief, sadness, and guilt all mix together, leaving a heavy weight on his chest. Relief because his childhood friend had felt the same all along. Sadness because it wasn't him who had prompted his colors. Guilt because he felt he had stolen Iwaizumi from Sugawara from the start.

Oikawa could only muster the strength to say a few words, but all that comes out is "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize for your feelings. At the end of the day, you love who you love, Oikawa," Sugawara says, as if he were calming a baby down from its tantrums (that’s probably the case, he thinks). "I love Hajime, too, but just not in the same way as you love him."

Oikawa suddenly sobs loudly and clings unto the smaller boy. Surprisingly, Sugawara had immediately accepted the sudden skinship.

"Dumb Iwa-chan, if I were him I'd be in love with you instead! Why does it have to be this confusing?" Oikawa wails into his nape.

"It's only confusing because you've been convincing yourself that your feelings aren't supposed to be there, Oikawa.”

It took a few stuttering and sniffling, unable to respond, until he finally says

"I’m sorry, Suga-chan, I want to love him."

Sugawara gives his signature smile, "go. It's your chance to be happy."

With that Oikawa runs out of the stadium to see the rest of his team and zeroes in on Iwaizumi who is walking away with Matsukawa patting his back. Even from his posture alone he knows that their vice captain had been crying.

And so he hopes that what ever he's going to say next will lift a little of his burden.

"Iwa-chan!" Iwaizumi turns only to have Oikawa tackle him into a hug. "Iwa-chan, I love you!"

Everyone had their eyes on the two, confused on what's going on between them--after all, they just had their final game, and the confession was definitely unnecessary; they were goddamn _soulmates_ (or so they still believe). But Oikawa couldn't care that he's saying this out of time, place, and context; the words have been left unspoken for far too long, he can't waste another second delaying it.

"I love you so much, that it has to be you, and only you." He sobs, clinging into his jacket.

There was no response for a few moments from the other boy. It felt like he was paralyzed to the core which made Oikawa anxious, but he keeps his grip, as if afraid he was going to slip away any moment.

Suddenly, a pair of strong arms wrap around his waist, and Iwaizumi's head was buried to his nape.

"Dumbass, that's not what you're supposed to say right now." He chuckles softly and tightens his hold around their captain. "I don't deserve you, not even as your ace."

Oikawa pulls away and puts his forehead against his best friend's, possibly his soon-to-be lover. "You're the best ace there is." He sniffles slightly before continuing,

"And you deserve to be happy. We deserve to be happy. Together."

______________

_"Are you sure about this?" Daichi asks, as he wraps his jacket around his best friend's fragile form. "You’ve been telling me you love him. Hell, you love him as much as he loves Oikawa."_

_Sugawara zips the jacket up, having its sleeves fall past his palms. Despite Daichi being an inch shorter than Hajime, their builds are quite similar, so Sugawara thinks that it’s inevitable that the jacket would remind him of the time his soulmate had lent him his._

_"He deserves to be happy, Daichi," he stares at the ends of the sleeves, "and it's not with me."_

**Author's Note:**

> first fic yay i ♡ iwaoi.
> 
> i always thought this soulmate au was best for some light angst.
> 
> follow my tumblr iwa—chan! and maybe leave a message for prompts and pairings for future fics? ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶


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